So… in the process dealing with hearing loss and vertigo, learning my way around hearing aids, I did what any modern girl would do. I went online and found forums. Sadly, most resemble virtual ghost towns where months go by with no posts. One email list looked promising though. It boasted of a large and active population. I signed up.
The welcome email looked great. Lots of people. Lots of interaction. So I posted… and got a few helpful responses, along with a bucketful of woe. Everyone was suddenly pouring out their woe-is-me stories of life with vertigo. Grumble.
While I completely understand the desire, and even the need, to talk to people who genuinely understand, I’ve never enjoyed surrounding myself with misery.
My way of dealing with life’s little curve balls is to have my bitch fest (like now), then find the humor in the situation, look for the silver lining, and move on.
Since this was an email list, I was getting emails even if I wasn’t part of the conversation. Suddenly my inbox was filled with junk… and I mean junk. Lists of things given up – like driving, working, going out with friends, eating out, high heels.
Wait. Whoa. Hold up. Just no. Oh fucking hell no. This is not me. Been there and done that and it’s a one-way ticket to a miserable place called Depressionville. Shit on that. Shit all over that!
The unsubscribe process included stating why you wanted to leave the list. I was polite, I was nice. I praised the good parts, and I was gentle about the negative.
And what did I get back?
A fucking guilt trip over how I should stay and be an example, a positive ray of light to help people learn to not focus on the negative. And I quote: “Too bad you couldn’t have helped them while looking for help.”
Wait, what? Now it’s my responsibility to “change hearts”? And yes, that term was used.
Sorry, I was thinking of something a little less depressing, thanks. Don’t get me wrong, I understand the need to bitch, or unload. I get the need to have an occasional moment of “fuck this sucks”. But not all the time. Not nonstop. And if I choose to not be a part of it, don’t even think about guilting me for walking away.
The real kicker? The moderator’s email signature included a scripture verse.
“May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all.” (2 Corinthians 13:14)
If that’s an example of grace, love, and fellowship… I think I’ll pass.